The meeting of great minds got under way. The aim was to focus the Institution on the way ahead to ensure that we were at the forefront of the vanguard in advance of our 30th anniversary year.
We needed some bright, economic ideas else costs would become in-illegible and just sky-rocket through the roof. Bill took the lead; he's new and still a bit green behind the ears, and occasionally he thrashes around in the dark like a blue-arsed fly, but he's a good man.
"If we're to expand our premises and facilities", he said, "the archie-tect will need to issue a variegation order!"
Arthur was totally non-pulsed. "It's a long road that leads nowhere and we're living hand to foot as it is!" he said.
"True", said Bill, "but I won't lose any sleepless nights over that, or we'll be up the creek without a canoe! We just need to go at this like a bull at a cow."
"Ok", I thought, "I might be as well hung as a sheep or a lamb." I produced my master plan. "This is the Jack and John book of project management." I said. "It conforms to the latest PDP plans and is linked to our CPA assessment. So while you're working through it, try to remember what we talked about tomorrow."
"The vagrancies of the financial system, mean that......", interrupted Jo.
"We'll just build that bridge when we come to it!", I snapped back, cutting her off in her prime and noting that I'd better keep my ears pierced for that one in future. I continued, "We must make sure that no stone is unturned......no sitting on the fencepost again!" I often find I'm grappling with my own ghost but the hat was on the other head this time. "Listen, chaps", I said, "I'll leave you to consider the way ahead. It's six of one, dime a dozen to me." I walked out and left them to their deliberations.
Returning to the meeting much later in the day the group appeared to be loaded to the gunwales. Now, I'm an atheist, thank God, but I shouted "Jumpin' Joseph is fat! What the hecky is going on here!". I could tell I'd just thrown a monkey into the wrench.
One of the group was so drunk she nearly fell over and had to grab hold of the dildo rail. Another was listening to music by that great jazz singer, what's her name .... the Elephant's Gerald I think, and yet another was reading a copy of 'Verification of death by nurses' - something to do with more poor standards in the health service, no doubt. This was clearly becoming a case of bolting the door after the horse has gone. We really needed to get on with collecting our 500th ism and preparing for our 30th anniversary celebrations. The hat was on the other head yet again!
